“Envy blinds men and makes it impossible for them to think clearly.” –Malcom X
I envy my father, even though I grew up without one. I envy the way he seduced my mother, and created a barrier of protection for her. They created me. I am the barrier, the grey area. I never had the talk that every boy should have with his father. So I grew up different from my peers. Growing up sucked for me.
Girls knew my secret, the guys did too. The bizarre thing about that secret is that I knew it not, and it was mine. “These B**these want Nike.” They knew my secret and they also knew that I was blind, something Frank and I both share. I thought I had a chance. They seduced me, not sexually. They made me spend what I had not. I was just a puppet, too dumb to realize what was happening. “They lookin’ for a check, tell em’ it ain’t likely.” Only if they knew, my life as a black man was a struggle on its own. Why expect me to struggle to provide also? I still did it though, because I was blind, and I love too much.
I do love women, I was chosen to protect them from men with ill intentions.
My sister never got my protection, the person who needed it most. I didn’t know then what I know now and it hurts me. We would’ve made the most destructive team. If only she knew that I was a gift sent to her, a true friend, unlike the ones who pretend. “It’s the same way you showed me.” You showed me how to love. You didn’t know it but I watched you. I needed advice, and your experience was enough.
The woman who homes me chose me for such a task. A woman whom we are destroying. I was chosen by Gaia, also known as Earth. She has emotions too you know, all living things do. She just shows them a little differently, that’s all. “I thought that I was dreamin’ when you said you love me.” It indeed was the start of nothing, Frank was right. Our planet loves us. She creates the one thing we need to breathe, and aids in growing our food, encouraging us to eat healthy. She gives us the tools we need for survival, tools such as; natural medicines, natural beauty products, and natural building products. One being hemp. Lucy survived long ago, with only the tools provided to her from Gaia, and how smart did she prove to be?
Do we love her as much as she loves us?
You can answer yes, but women usually believe what they can see. She’s heating up because she is furious. We are killing her. I was also born to protect her, a job that will be a bit hard, especially in a world where Donald Trump has a chance to lead. “I will always love you how I do,” which is why I vow to better my life so that I can influence others to better yours, Gaia.